Social Media Addiction: When Parents Are Worse Off Than Their Children

Ninety percent of Italian schools have now included a ban on smartphone use in their school regulations: in some cases, students can keep their smartphones, turned off, in their backpacks; in other cases, they must be deposited in the designated containers provided in classrooms or at the school entrance. The results are clear: according to data from the Ministry of Education, the increase in children's attention and concentration was "high" in 20 percent of cases and "medium" in 56,6 percent of schools. Likewise, several countries, including in Europe, seem intent on following the "Australian model": social media banned for those under 16. And in American courts, cases are multiplying. class action with demands for millions in damages from big tech companies that do nothing to stop the invasion of their platforms among minors.

So, at the moment, to contain the hegemony of social media we have taken the judicial route and that of prohibitions, not only through laws. They are useless things, certainly, but unfortunately of very limited effectiveness. (for example, kids tend to consider bans as an excellent reason to get around them, and from the cynicism of "their lords" at meta and Google, no cooperation can be expected.) if they don't come accompanied by some changes that have a strong and clear impact on lifestylesEveryone, not just teenagers. And here we come to a question that risks being overlooked, but is actually one of the keys to addressing the problem with the right amount of energy. But are we sure that social media addiction affects teenagers and not also, if not to a greater extent, adults—namely, parents and sometimes grandparents? This isn't a rhetorical question, and the data proves it first and foremost.

A Censis survey provides a very precise picture of Internet addiction in Italy. A fifth of the adult population in Italy, over 20 percent, considers itself completely dependent on the Internet. He acknowledges, with his hands raised in surrender, his addiction, despite his age, which should have brought greater responsibility and awareness. 63 percent of adults start their day with a typical gesture of social media addicts: checking all the messages received on various platforms. And immediately, before even drinking coffee, they begin exchanging emails, texts, and photos on Instagram. Again: 34,1 percent of adults he has taken the bad habit of placing it at the table, like a gun, smartphone on the tableAnd to respond to any message that arrives, even when you have a bite in your mouth or are pleasantly conversing with your fellow diners.

 If for adolescents, social media addiction represents a question of identity, of being part of the pack, for adults, technology is a frantic, and sometimes even ridiculous, pursuit of an unknown world, but also a way to feel less alone and more vital, a universe in which to express one's opinion, using, even clumsily, the various languages ​​of the online world, starting with social media. Chatting, tweeting, posting. And so on. All of this, often, with unbridled compulsion, with a narcissism without limits, and with a curiosity rather limited to the two areas (sex and gaming) in which the Internet universe is most navigated.

Addiction to social media, and the Internet in general, is highly contagious, and a social media-addicted parent or grandparent sets a terrible example. Sometimes it becomes embarrassing, even for children and grandchildren who read his messages. Much more than a young person closed in on himself and attached to technology, he loses touch with reality, starting from his personal data. Finally, he is a person who has no alibi to justify his addiction: he, or she, grew up in the age of books, of conversazione, of cinema. Why reduce communication and relationships to pure and simple online contact?

It's beautiful to see a generation of teenagers which, for the first time in history, teaches older generations, parents and grandparents, how to use technologyA generation that educates, even before being educated. But it's sad to see how they, mature men and women, squander this opportunity, forgetting that every age has its own tones throughout life, and turning into compulsive geeks. Ready to miseducate those who come after.

Field research seems to confirm what we perceive in our daily lives: the dependence on social media, as cell phone anxiety, it doesn't only or primarily concern young people, but first and foremost adults. The images we see every day speak louder than numbers. The small family—father, mother, and two children—sitting at a restaurant table, each diner hunched over their smartphones, fiddling with their devices. The shouting over smartphones during social media conversations on the train. The images shared on Instagram of one's day, as if our daily lives could always be of interest to others. The insults and outbursts on Facebook.

It's adults who have taught teenagers to be addicted to social media. They're the ones who have failed to put any checks on the galloping advance of technology. And they're the ones who have failed to update etiquette, adapting it to the new compulsive use of electronic devices. There's a story that keeps repeating itself, a generation later, and we've already seen it: television slavery. From a household appliance, first adults, and then children, even the youngest, have transformed it into a babysitter, a life companion, a teacher of life and lifestyle, the preferred place where a ruling class is selected and acclaimed. If we start with these responsibilities and each person assumes theirs, perhaps we will be able to avoid being suffocated by social media, as we have been invaded by television.

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